i think i’m going to forget about my age and never remember it again. this numbers game is so inconvenient. i just want to be me, no age attached. i can act like a child, like an adult, like anything in between. don’t ask me how old i am, because i don’t know. i’m ageless. i’m all ages.
g1t 0ut m4h f4c3.
today at work, a guy came in and told me he’d tip me a dollar if i could name the band playing over the speakers. i told him tears for fears. he then asked me if i was in my twenties, a singer, or a performer of some sort. i answered no to each question and served him his smoothie. however, i digress.
needless to say, i got a dollar. and a high five.
dear california,
see you in 22 days.
love,
your most awesome returning resident
i use elbow and wrist interchangeably. come to think of it, i use knee and ankle interchangeably also.
moral of the story: i use elbow, wrist, knee, and ankle interchangeably. in every combo.
evidenced by the fact that it took me a good five minutes to figure out that someone was talking about their wrist (when they indeed said “wrist”) and not their elbow.
how does one go about giving one’s two weeks notice when one’s boss is nowhere to be found?
how smelly people can’t smell themselves. like, i’m pretty sure i know i reek after going to the gym. and i can tell when it’s me stinking up the place and not some other person.
i just don’t get it.
sometimes i feel lame for loving things everyone else loves.
dear idiots,
“loan” is not a verb. and no, i will not lend you any money.
always selfish,
bwintz
